Sh*t My Dad Says Hardcover - 2010

From the publisher

"This book is ridiculously hilarious, and makes my father look like a normal member of society." --Chelsea Handler

Tuesdays with Morrie meets F My Life in this hilarious book about a son's relationship with his foul-mouthed father by the comedy writer who created the massively popular Twitter feed of the same name.

A few months ago, comedy writer Justin Halpern, 29, found himself living at home with his 73-year-old father after being dumped by his longtime girlfriend. Sam Halpern had never minced words, and when Justin moved back home, he was smart enough to write down all the ridiculous things his dad said to him, like "The universe does not give a fuck about you. You are a speck in its shit," and "The worst thing you can be is a liar....Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2," and "Everybody loves that Da Vinci code book. Bullshit, it sucks. I read it. It's for all the dummies." These quotes, or philosophies, have become "Shit My Dad Says," a Twitter page that in less than a month was being followed by over 500,000 people, had spawned articles in newspapers and magazines, as well as inspiring calls from movie and television producers, celebrities, and just about everyone else who heard about the site.

SH*T MY DAD SAYS, Justin Halpern's first book, is a mix of his dad's quotations and longer-form essays in the vein of David Sedaris and Chelsea Hander. It is a hilarious, unforgettable account of a unique father-son relationship and the filthy words of wisdom that have defined it.