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What about the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce
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What about the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce Paperback - 2004

by Sandra Blakeslee

From the co-authors of the bestselling "The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce" comes this groundbreaking guide for parents on how to help their children at the time of the breakup and in the many years that follow within the post-divorce and remarried family.


Summary

The ten chapters in WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS? give detailed scenarios and their alternatives, likely outcomes and surprises. They include: 1) The Break Up: This chapter focuses on the adult in crisis.2) What To Tell the Children: These words will be remembered for a lifetime—how to get them right3) The First Year: Maximum turmoil. Setting new routines and maintaining a connection with each child4) The Dust Settles: The issues that come up in the first decade after divorce. 5) Co-Parenting: How to be good parents while living separate lives.6) Teens in the Post-Divorce Family: Troublesome behavior, morality on trial, your child’s future relationships and much more.7) The Young Adult of Divorce: Spouses and negotiations for college and living expenses, abandonment issues.8) Long Term Changes in Parent/Child Relationships: The members of divorced and remarried families can be both closer and more conflicted than in intact families—what the issues are and how to address them.9) Second Marriages: Preparing a child for new relationships—what are the children most afraid of? How to be a step parent; why second marriages succeed or fail.10) Bridging the Generations: Adult children of divorce and how they relate to their parents—the two way street.

From the publisher

The groundbreaking handbook that helps parents guide their children through divorce and co-parenting -- including the introduction of step-parents -- from a New York Times bestselling author and child psychologist. This is the definitive work from the renowned child psychologist Judith Wallerstein on a subject that concerns millions of American moms and dads: How can you protect your children during and after divorce? Divorce is not a single event but a lifelong trajectory of changed circumstances that demand a different kind of parenting than we have ever known. In What About the Kids? Wallerstein draws on thirty years of in-depth interviews with children of divorce and their parents to show how to create a new family with compassion and wisdom. It covers issues that arise at the time of divorce as well as suggestions for talking to your children months and years after the event. Eminent psychologist Judith S. Wallerstein shares her unique insight and advice in What About the Kids? -- the first comprehensive guide to easing the impact of divorce on your children -- including:

  • The best and worst ages for children to experience their parents' divorce
  • Right and wrong ways to explain divorce to your children
  • Choosing a custody arrangement that's best for your child
  • How to involve the grandparents -- a major resource?
  • Getting the children on your side when you form new relationships
  • The positive effects of divorce on children (believe it or not)
  • How divorce can actually make you a better parent
  • Raising children who grow up able to form lasting relationships

First line

After Hurricane Andrew slammed into the Florida coast in 1992, killing twenty-six people and causing more than $30 billion in property damage, stunned residents were slow to pick up the pieces.

Details

  • Title What about the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce
  • Author Sandra Blakeslee
  • Binding Paperback
  • Edition Reprint
  • Pages 400
  • Volumes 1
  • Language ENG
  • Publisher Hachette Books, Boston, Massachusetts, U.S.A.
  • Date 2004-03-17
  • ISBN 9780786887514 / 0786887516
  • Weight 0.75 lbs (0.34 kg)
  • Dimensions 8 x 5.2 x 1.2 in (20.32 x 13.21 x 3.05 cm)
  • Ages 18 to UP years
  • Grade levels 13 - UP
  • Themes
    • Topical: Family
  • Dewey Decimal Code 306.89

About the author

Judith S. Wallerstein is the founder and executive director of the Center for the Family in Transition. She is senior lecturer emerita at the School of Social Welfare at the University of California at Berkeley, where she has taught for twenty-six years. She has spoken with more divorced families than anyone in the nation, and lectured to thousands of family court judges, attorneys, mental health professionals, mediators, and educators. She has appeared on Oprah, the Today show, and Good Morning America, among others. She is the author, with Sandra Blakeslee, of the national bestsellers The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts and Second Chances: Men, Women, and Children a Decade After Divorce; with Blakeslee and Julia M. Lewis of the bestseller The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: A 25-Year Landmark Study; and, with Dr. Joan Berlin Kelly, of Surviving the Breakup: How Children and Parents Cope with Divorce. She lives in Belvedere, California. Sandra Blakeslee is an award-winning science writer who contributes regularly to the New York Times. She lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico.
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What About the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce

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What About the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce

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